Untitled

Today
Woken this morning from irrelevant
Unwrapping,
Say bring that big one,
The let down under the red ball,
Who knows what that means,
What about the mortgage, that leans on the tip of that tree,
Schools calling about next semester,
Growing up u promised whatever
The shelves had to offer, say,
Trade them back for dads black hair, bring back that 1 room,
Where brothers eavesdropped on
Spinning gears of the other,
This house is hard to heat with
2 fireplaces, ungratefully
Discarded toys rust next to the water sprinklers, hamburger helper fills the stomach the same as steak,
Today think about yesterday.

I only ever loved u when we were naked, I only ever cared before release, I only ever gave u children when they were splattered across your chest or back, Just like the girl who passed me notes in class the day before I only ever listened when u were moaning, I only ever looked at the eyes in the back of ur head, I only ever pretended to be happy so that I could fuck u. Becuz I knew u fucked him, becuz I was only ever a nice guy.
I only ever told ur secret so I could help, I only ever cried becuz I missed u, I only ever cried becuz I was not emotional, I only ever cried becuz i was faking it, I only ever cried becuz gillette hurts me, I only ever cried becuz my scars don’t show, I only ever cried cuz I knew u were in his arms, I only ever cried becuz u were honest and sweet and good for me , as good as acid rain on the smile of the Mona Lisa.